Finding Purpose

Trump’s Win Made Me Angry

Like many of my friends and family, I woke early and openly wept. Tears, heaving sobs I was unable to stop. Loosing the 2016 Presidential Election to Donald Trump was a punch in the gut.

Why are women crying so openly? Because America once again said, this behavior is fine. It’s non big deal. Women in America were once again told men are allowed, in fact rewarded, with the highest office in the land for treating us, women, as if we are less.

Why Women Cried When Trump Won the Election

What do I mean?

Well, I’ll give you an example.

Like that the one time, when I was in a small room with five men at work. One of them (the boss) started telling jokes about pussy-bleach. Things got uncomfortable in the room quick. I tried to hold it together. Being the only woman, in a small room with five men the boss says “yeah Brandy, tell us, what is pussy-bleach?” Faced flushed, I stammered out a joking answer wishing the meeting would end, for the love of god end. I tried to be one of the guys, to not feel effected, to make it a joke too, but I failed.

I’ve worked with men all my life. I am used to locker room talk. The four other men, were my friends. We’d spent time bonding, getting to know each other, working together. We had rapport. Not so with the boss. He was, after all, the boss. Really, our bosses boss.

I had the courage to go directly to said boss later. I told him, the locker room talk was getting a little too much, too intense and uncomfortable and ask if he would be the leader in pulling it back to a professional space. I was told “maybe you should go get a job at PBS.”

Stupid bravery on my part. Standing up for myself against someone with far more power. I was handed a threat. At that point I had to get a new job. I sealed my fate to moment I opened his office door. I’d spoken up and there was no chance of comfort moving forward.

I actually loved and was proud of that job. I’d fought so hard to get it, to do well and rise in it, but I had to walk away or face that boss again, every, single, day.

This is why I cry.

Gender Equality Took a Step Back

There were many things that last nights election said about our country. The loudest and clearest to me, is that character does not matter to American’s as much as I had hoped. That racism, sexism and downright bigotry are being accepted because we as a country are in survival mode. Heads down, concerned with our own lives and our own pain. We are not reaching out to each other. We are not understanding each other.

Having Hope Despite Trump’s Win

I called my parents this morning. Crying, something I haven’t done since my teenage years.

My Mom calmed me with her endless optimism. My Dad shared his fears for he and his wife, as well as many, many aging veterans. Financial turmoil is scary for Baby Boomers. Plus, his fear as a veteran of having a man like Trump with his finger on Nuclear weapons.

Give that one a thought Trump voters. American’s sons and daughters have to follow Trump as a leader, into international affairs. Trump has already offended world leaders far and wide. That fear is real. That fear is also why I cry.

True to form though, my Dad said something that calmed me to my core. “this is like a wildfire, scored earth. Let us hope, something beautiful will grow in it’s place.”

Donald Trump did not win the popular vote. That is the silver lining. Once I stopped crying and avoiding facebook, twitter and the news, I realized there is some hope.

There are more American’s like me, who value character. Who like me, believe Trump is a dangerous man to trust in the white house. Who like me, fear women’s rights will take a serious hit to progress.

Let us hope, that we do not loose Hillary Clinton as a fighter for women’s rights all together. Let us hope that the younger generation of men and women will be angered by what’s about to happen in this country. Let us hope that their energy and perspective will be the beauty that comes out of this.

My hope, is that we will have a woman in the White House. I believe that sexism not be a continuing part of the American Way. If my niece Brianna has anything to say about it, it will be her. I hope it does not take that long. I hope I am alive to see it in my lifetime.

This is why I cry. This is where I find strength. Pantsuit Nation.


Darcy on Facebook: “As a woman I was crying this morning. Not because a woman lost- but because a man who so openly treats women with such disrespect was able to garner enough support to get elected.”

Judith on Facebook: “I of course wanted Hillary to win, but it really will be okay. I believe that and Trump better change or someone might hurt him. Some folks are angry. I hope he does some real soul searching and will try to do the right thing.”

Val on Facebook: “I was thinking of you guys last night. We were all together in 2012. What a different time this was. I have been crying on and off, too. I wish we could hug each other. Days like this being a nomad feels pretty damn lonely. I just want to be surrounded by people i love.”

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